Black Splatter

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This past weekend, I accomplished quite a rare and big feat – I cleaned my younger brother’s closet. Now, let me begin by saying my brother is quite clueless when it comes to fashion. His idea of “everyday-style” is basketball shorts, cut-off t-shirts with arm holes as big as my body and flip flops worn by old Indian men (you know what I’m talking about). It’s all sorts of “no” in just three pieces. With that, I figured this was going to be a slightly easy task, unlike dumping clothes from a girl’s closet. I always thought it was girls who had sentimental value to certain pieces of clothing. Wrong…this is so wrong. Watching the look of horror cross his face every time I wanted to dump some awful tee with pit stains and rips is the exact same face I get when watching the Sara McLaughlin SPCA commercial.

75% of what I saw in his closet was horrifying. Not only did I pick things up and say “ugh” then fling them into the garbage but muttered it over and over again each time he came up with an excuse to keep something that was (for lack of a better word)…atrocious. Now, I’ve heard a lot of excuses from girls when they want to keep pieces but the things I heard from my brother were pretty golden.

Example 1 – a bright, lime green shirt, already way too small, with the lettering and image on it melted…TOGETHER. It took me three rounds to convince him to let me toss it. THREE!

Example 2 – a long sleeve, completely worn out, faded gray shirt with holes and rips at the end of each sleeve to which he said, “I wear that in winter. I can put my thumbs through the holes.” Dear god, why? (I didn’t win on this one).

Example 3 – a shirt that said “Back then hoes didn’t want me…Now I’m hot hoes all on me” to which he said, “Well, it IS faded.” I don’t even know where to begin…

Example 4 – while holding up the 100th t-shirt I found he said, “I got that from the camp I volunteered at for the kids who had cancer.” OKAY so that went right back into the closet.

Example 5 – “I have to keep that one, I feel like Roger Federer when I wear it.” How…HOW is this possible?

In response to me switching all the hangers for uniformity; he responded “Don’t you think that, that’s a bit excessive?” They are all now plastic and white.

After 2 hours we finally narrowed it down to a decent sized closet with wearable things. Though between you and me, I was way too lenient but I had to stop at some point otherwise this poor kid would barely have any clothes. In the end he was using the words “Jo is revamping my closet.” or “Jo told me I can only use white hangers.” Task accomplished.

For tips on how to really clean out your closet, visit my A Tale of Two Closets post I wrote.

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This outfit has been a favorite of mine all summer. I scooped this top up at Target a couple of months back because I loved the print and material. It’s perfect for those hot days when I can wear it just like this with shorts or in the fall/winter as a layering piece; perhaps with a pair of leather side-panel leggings, black boots and a jacket/blazer. I don’t normally wear floppy hats (I’m more of a fedora girl) but I’m actually kind of liking this accessory. I am now on the hunt for one in a more fall-esque hue, like oxblood, black or camel.

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I know I said that my next style post was going to be a fall-version of my previous outfit post but I decided to switch things around and do a fall-essentials post with various outfits featuring these items. Since, this will take me a bit longer, it probably won’t go up until next week or the week after. In the meantime, check back as I plan on posting a couple non-outfit posts within the next week or two.

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2 thoughts on “Black Splatter

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